NEW BLOGAROO!

Hey guys- check the new blog outrageouswhat.blogspot.com Its still me... only you get to meet the real me :D Ill be closing this one sooner or later so have a look and follow if you want

xo

DR

So this is how it goes down

Okay so this is how my night went down last night:

I got home from work at five and remembered that I promised Nicole that  I would go with her to the vet slave auction (some kind of fundraiser). So we leave at 6 with Lauren and pick up some of Nicoles friends on the way - Duncan, Sam, and Big Gay Ray. Because I had decided earlier on that I want to have a sober month I had made the move towards not drinking. Nicole had made that same move as she has a lot of study to do. So we get there and I very quickly feel socially awkward and seek alcohol to remedy the situation- 8 beers in (I was buying them 4 at a time) and I decide that I may as well make a night of it and keep going. This was around the time that they started auctioning off a prosthetic leg which I began to bid for (you can never be too prepared right?). LUCKILY I didnt win because it went for $200 to my friend Sarah. Anyway we make it to town and Im pretty sure Iv managed to offend every person in the car - for some reason Im going through this faze of being really mean to people when Im drunk. In particular Sam because he was giving me a creepy vibe and wouldnt stop asking me questions about my life. So I was like "fuck you talk a lot of shit" after he told me I looked like I could be in the new video clip from LMFAO because of my 'look'... What do we think??? Insult or compliment? Im still not 100% sure. Anyway we head to the Beer Barrel and down what Nicole and I have dubbed the "Quick Cum In Your Pants Before You Fuck Me" (QCIYPBYFM) which is a story for another day but is based on an unfortunate situation Nicole found herself in... anyway is Tequila and Bayleys - sounds gross right? SURPRISINGLY NOT!

Anyway this goes on for a while drinking and being a total loser lol. I had the best drunken chat to Sarah about how we need to hang out more etc etc you know the usual drunken D&M's that you get on a night out. And then I spotted this chick who was obviously a big lezzy and basically forced her to become my bestie for the rest of the night. So I dragged her off to the gay bar because she had never been and I seem to always end up there. Chris was there Ilian and you will be surprised to know that I was extremely couteous. So I basically danced like a madman for a few hours with this chick (who I dont even know her name at this point) and then I see Scott from One 4 All and have a yarn and then Zachary and drag him up for a dance... and then we made out a bit which was a bit of a surprise but not all bad lol.

Then my friend Lee turns up and at the end of the night we end up going back to her place... We sat and got high for a bit and then I got in an argument with her flatmate because I didnt believe he had the job he said he had... he was claiming to have a pretty sweet job but he just looked thick as shit lol so after offending him I taxid home.

I wake up this morning to Nicole bursting into my room asking me if I wanted breakfast... Three things happened at once here that surprised me.

1- Nicole waking me up
2- Zachary was next to me
3- We were both naked

So turns out we slept together... until like 6 in the morning coz I remember my alarm going off and interrupting lol.

I found out later from Nicole that she bought a guy home that I got in a fight with in first year because he called my sister a slut. So anyway she called him on it and basically called him a dick which made me happy. What also made me happy was the fact that she said he had a small dick and was a crap root- she also has his credit card still!  So it turns out this guy Dan was at the auction too and I was going through my phone this morning and this was the message I sent my sister "You remember that guy that you slept with that I got in a fight with that I hate... hes gonna get raped by a gay guy" - for the longest time I was worried that the 'gay guy' Iwas referring to was me and I was somehow planning to take him against his will- thankfully Nicole was able to shed some light on that and turns out Big Gay Ray (the dirty sleaze) was hitting on him quite obviously all night.

... then I had KFC and took the dog for a walk and I now dont plan on leaving my bed for the rest of the weekend...

On Hiatus

Okay sorry guys I have not really had the energy to blog in a LONG time! 

A lot of shit has been going on in my life quite recently- the first and probably the most exciting is that I finally got a bite and had a job interview today. OMG I had to do a typing test and I was so nervous I only managed 47 words a minute- thank god the minimum requirement is 30 (I would like to point out I got 97% accuracy though).

Point number 2- we had our '6 month inspection' the other week and spent the weekend making the place presentable- By presentable Im not just talking ding the dishes and giving the dust a wipe- Im talking buying a lawn mower AND Vacuum cleaner and going nuts! - Wait it gets better- the inspection is while I am at work so I dont really get to see how the whole thing goes down but from what I hear it went a little something like this:

Paz: "Welcome landlords to our wonderful home"

Aunty Cole: "Yes welcome to the home what love built"

Paz: "Some may even compare us to a nun- we don't ever have sex- we don't even have genitals."

Aunty Cole: "No drinking allowed in this house... in fact we have a rule against anything 'fun'- We just live here and clean... We are good tenants you see and that is what good tenants do."

Paz: "Please wont you come in."

Christian Landlord: "We want you to move out because we are moving in!"

So basically the last couple of weeks have been spent looking for places to live... and WE GOT ONE! Thanks to Paz and Aunty Cole everything has been taken care of- It makes me feel kind of inadequate and lazy. its not that I didnt want to help its just they seem to be 2+/- 1 step ahead... anyway without much help from me we are moving this weekend which I am super excited about!!!

Now on to the not so good news. Rowdy (ex's ex best friend) got back in contact with me which makes me not so happy but I am thinking of just getting him around for a bit of a spoon- not even sex just feeling like cuddles at the moment. 

I have been kind of like that for a while and Im not sure why but even more now because I found out last night that a friend of mine who I used to work with and had THE biggest crush on was killed in a car accident only the day before. So Im a little down at the moment and I think the reason I decided to do this post was because I dont really feel like I can talk to any of my friend about it because I dont want to drag them down either... lets call it blog therapy? 

So I dont know what this is but its something I caught myself writing mindlessly after I was given the bad news. Im not sure that it will make sense to anyone but me but I feel the need to get it out of my system.

I used to think about almost every day

When you smiled it made me smile
When we talked it gave me butterflies
When you laughed it made me sick with 'feelings'
When we laughed together I felt on top of the world

When you left I was sad
When you promised to keep in touch I held on to hope
When you didnt keep your promise I was distraught
When I started to get over you I saw you again

Then it started from the beginning
like a circle
Never seeming to end

Now youre gone for good

I think of all the things I could have said
I think of all the things I should have said
I think of all the things I wish I had said
I think of all the things I will never get to say

I miss you
I have missed you
I will never forget you

 

 

Guess Who Got Laid!!!?

Woohoo- and yes it was as angry and rough as I had anticipated. But to be honest I couldn't really give a fuck- I got what I wanted... I'm sure he got what we wanted and we managed to keep it quiet (always a bonus when there are peoples rooms adjoining 2 of my four walls). 

Work sucked just as much as I thought it would today. We have stopped doing the missing persons reports for Christchurch and another center has taken it over which is good news for us- I think it was starting to take its toll on a lot of our staff... But then just when I thought all the stress in my life was over with a big fuck more shit seems to hit the fan:

• My car needs to be registered
• To register my car it needs to pass its Warrant Of Fitness
• Its warrant has been expired for about 1 month
• The washing machine has broken
• Im pretty sure I missed my doctors appointment
• Im almost 100% sure I made the appointment in my sleep
• Spent the whole of Sunday cleaning and gardening today for our house inspection
• Bought a $200 vacuum cleaner and a $200 lawn mower to help with the cleaning
• I couldn't make it to the inspection because I had to work
• The landlords handed us 1 months notice to move out

All in all a shitty few weeks... In other news I'm thinking of starting to Vlog. I have fallen in love with otherijustine and Toby Turner and they make me want to vlog. But I'm also having one of those downer buzzez where I don't have many followers and I feel like I'm talking to one or two people- I hate to feel like a shameless self promoter but part of this blog was to meet new people and I feel like I haven't met anyone in a while SO if you have a blog and you like to read mine... heck you don't even need to like it... or read it- Rephrase that- if you know how to get to my blog or have just stumbled upon it by some kind of happy coincidence please post a link on your page- if you let me know I would be more than happy to do the same for you :D

Also you may have seen the link to Best Male Blogs over there >>>>> if you do read please go and vote for me :D

I'm okay!

Hi guys- I have received a couple of emails asking if I am okay since you haven't heard from me since disaster struck two days ago.

The day of the Christchurch earthquake will be one which resonates in the minds of all Kiwis both here and abroad for a long time after. The news have been covering the total devastation non stop for three days now- it's times like this though that I wish news stations only presented us with the facts. 

Campbell Live last night did many stories both happy and sad- I wish they could understand that people like me don't want these sad stories which have been over embellished to make the show seem as though it has a heart... and that it understands what these people are going through. Give me the FACTS!!

As most of you know I work in a Call Center- being that the Christchurch City Council Call Center that would normally handle minor distressful situations (which is only 12 seats) is unable to be opened- we have had the calls diverted to us- After only 4 hours sleep (I was wide awake the night and stupidly decided a run at 3am would zap sufficient amounts of my energy) I was woken up and told to come in to work straight away. The beginning was just calls seeking information on welfare points and water availability then later in the afternoon we started to take the over-flow from the Missing Persons Center- 11 hours later I was sent home for three hours to sleep which of course I less than capable of doing with my mind racing at 100 miles an hour then back in to work at 9pm with $100 worth of Red Bull, V and chocolate and I worked through until 7:30 am this morning. In this shift, the missing persons calls came flooding in- some genuine like the man looking for his wife and children who had been in the CTV building to some less genuine calls from international reporters wanting to the the "scoop" or someones great uncles sister who is ringing on behalf of her brother from England who wants to know if 'Susan Smith' is okay (NOT a real query just a made up name) because they know that she lives in New Zealand but they are not sure where because the last time they spoke to her was Christmas Day 2005. There was some happy calls of people who called in to say that people they had reported missing had been found- but then we also got a few where people were found but they were not alive.

I am blown away but the attitudes of the people who were here taking these calls with me- throughout all of the distress and sadness they managed to keep positive and get the job done- We have had people volunteering for this left-right and center from strangers to ex staff of ours and all who are more than happy to help where they can  for as long as we need them and I think times like this- these people are testament to the Kiwi culture and how we are all there for one another. We may argue and fight amongst ourselves over trivial matters but we band together where it counts the most and that is why I love this country... It's a shame that sometimes it take such a disaster for a country to show its true colors.

Pent Up Anger+Pent Up Sexual Frustration

I feel sorry for the next person I have sex with- Seriously- I have that much pent up anger and that much sperm in stores that its basically going to be the loudest angriest roughest fuck of all time.

No bastard will hire me still. Iv been considering going in to prostitution... Its basically against everything I stand for but A) its legal here and B) I am really THAT desperate for a new job. Also I guess it would kind of kill two birds with one stone in my case. I get loads of sex- all the angry sex i could want AND I get paid to do it.

I cant remember if I told you about the argument I had with my boss a couple of weeks back. Basically she tried to discipline me for something that I was had 0 involvement in and in the meeting we had- she started getting quite heated. More yelling at DR woo hoo she even went so far as to swear at me. Keep in mind this is the nice boss who wouldn't hurt a fly but basically in this place 'shit rolls down hill' and it hits you hard and fast. I took this chance to basically vent my frustrations about the crappy company and her as a shitty boss... Needless to say- she barely speaks to me now.

To be honest- everything I said to here was not out of exasperation and it wasn't anything I regret saying... Basically she was given her promotion because she lied and cheated to make herself look the best, whether or not staff are allowed to do certain things is totally dependent on her mood and she dances around the answer to any question because she can't answer anything because she has no fucking clue what she is doing. I told her all of this- not once did she deny anything and not once did she form any kind of rebuttal to my argument.

The stupid thing is she has gone all childish about the whole thing and is ignoring me- she has also cut me and Joey from Facebook (something I wouldn't have ever known if Joey hadn't told me since I don't actually put much stock in the site) but she has also had a bitch to her husband about it and now every time he calls for her and I answer I have to put up with his rudeness. 

I think this whole incident  has taught me a lot about character and how not to judge a book by its cover... Because at the end of the day- your friend will be willing to screw you if it means they get to look good. 

Anyway its been like 3 weeks since I've had a shag and I was thinking about it just before and I haven't had a decent pash in a while either... Whats going on with me- I have changed. I seem to have replaced my alcohol and sex fueled nights with running and gardening of all things... I don't like who I'm turning in to. I'm scared of being bored- I even applied for a job at a bank... A BANK FOR FUCK SAKE! I couldn't think of anything more boring!!!  

So I have another bone to pick also... Joey whom I love dearly is kinda seeing this guy whom I hate with a passion. Before she moved in here I told her that I didn't want him coming around since I have seen and heard about the way he treats her and I don't like it at all. So she moved in and he started coming over any way. I figured I would let this one slide since she probably just wanted a familiar face or something I dunno... Pre-cursor to this story- we were drinking one night at my place before she moved in and he rings her non stop to abuse her "You're just a fucking slut" "You're worthless" "I'm going to smash Kane" (her ex) and basically accusing her of being a whore some how I get dragged into this some guy he has NEVER met "Im getting sick of that DR faggot too". WTF? Dude A)I have never even met you B)Shes not your property let alone your girlfriend C)Go and hang yourself you pedophile (shes only 19 and hes in his 30's) The funny thing is he is nothing but nice to my face but I have been dragged into their arguments a couple of times now and he says some pretty nasty shit. OH P.S. the fucking loser lives with his ex girlfriend and THEIR daughter... Okay so Joey is a complete fuckwitt for even considering anything with this guy but she never listens to advice to I would rather just let her fuck up and learn from her own mistakes. 

So anyway I hear them argue all the time through the walls because our rooms are next to each other. I'm slowly getting to the end of my rope and the next time they argue I am going to tell her that I don't want him around here. A couple of weeks back me and Aunty Cole got sooooo fucking high and Joey and Pedo got so loud with their arguing that neither of us could tell if it was arguing or really rough sex. Basically the whole flat hates him coming over ... basically the whole flat hates him full stop. Pretty soon I'm sure the whole flat will hate her for brining him over. I am definitely planting that seed because she doesn't seem to get that it makes us all uncomfortable to seem him treat her like that. If he is here I have resolved to be cold and do anything short of ignore her and then when hes not around I'm friendly.  Aside from not wanting her to see him for her own sake- This is my house and I shouldn't be made to feel so uncomfortable in my own house. If he payed rent here guaranteed I would have moved out a long time ago but he doesn't so I feel I have every right to tell her that I don't want him here. If it boils down to it, I don't really care if that means her having to move out. If she is going to pick some scummy cunt over a friend that actually cares than thats her own doing- am I right?

Normally a good rant would make me feel better about stuff but now I just feel even angrier...

How To Lower Your Petrol Prices

So Below is an email I got from this lady I work with who insists on sending me at least four pointless joke emails a day and I only let her keep doing it because she has no life and I feel sorry for her.  Todays email was a little different in that it actually bought up a pretty good point- to my surprise. I did however feel kind of let down by the fact that it ended with one of those "Send this to 1 billion people and you will get lots and lots of sex" kind of deals because it would have otherwise been a half decent proposal.  Consider the below email for me and let me know what you think. Personally I think it is a great idea (only I took out the bullshit at the end for your benefit-fuck Im good to you!). THIS IS NOT THE 'DON'T BUY' PETROL FOR ONE DAY, BUT IT WILL SHOW YOU HOW WE CAN GET PETROL BACK DOWN TO $1.00 PER Litre.... This was originally sent by Phillip Hollsworth, a retired Coca Colaexecutive. If you are tired of the gas prices going up AND they will continue to rise this winter, take time to read this, PLEASE.  Phillip offered this good idea.This makes MUCH MORE SENSE than the 'don't buy petrol on a certain day' campaign that was going around last April or May! It is worth your consideration. Join the resistance!!!! We are going to hit $ 2.00 a litre and it might go higher!! Want petrol prices to come down? We need to take some intelligent, united action. The oil companies just laughed at last year’s action because they knew we would not continue to 'hurt' ourselves by refusing to buy petrol.  It was more of an inconvenience to us than it was a problem for them.  BUT whoever thought of this idea, has come up with a plan that can really work. Please read on and join with us! By now, you're probably thinking petrol priced at about $1.50 is cheap. It is currently $1.90 for regular unleaded. Now that the oil companies and the OPEC nations have conditioned us to think that the cost of a liter of gas is CHEAP at $1.50, we need to take aggressive action to teach them that BUYERS control the market place...not sellers. With the price of gasoline going up more each day, we consumers need to take action. The only way we are going to see the price of petrol come down is if we hit someone in the pocketbook by not purchasing their petrol! And, we can do that WITHOUT hurting ourselves. How? Since we all rely on our cars, we can't just stop buying petrol. But we CAN have an impact on petrol prices if we all act together to force a price war. Here's the idea: For the rest of this year, DON'T purchase ANY petrol from  BP the biggest price-up driver company. If they are not selling any petrol, they will be inclined to reduce their prices. If they reduce their prices, the other companies will have to follow suit. But to have an impact, we need to reach literally millions of BP petrol buyers. It's SO simple!

My Celebrity Crush

So I have had to think about this quite a lot as there as SO many celebrities that I would love to fuck- and not just because theyre famous- mainly because I find them sexy as hell!

So I have managed to compile this list for you- some of which i think will surprise you:

5.Quite obviously one Mr Jay Brannan- I have had more of a thing for him since I saw him take a cock in the movie Short Bus. 

4. Im not sure if you have ever seen the movie 'In the Land of Women' but it is basically the sole reason I have put Adam Brody as my number 4. Admittedly I have a thing for preppy, slightly geekish kind of guys and I think Adam has the perfect combination of preppy, geeky and sexy all rolled into one.

3. Elisha Cuthbert SURPRISE- I actually surprised myself when I came to the conclusion that I would definitely play hide the sausage with her. This only came about from watching one of my all time favorite hangover movies 'The Girl Next Door'.

TOTAL COINCIDENCE I FOUND THIS PHOTO

2. The film 'Black Swan' basically confirmed what I originally thought from watching 'Forgetting Sarah Marshall' - MILA KUNIS is one sexy bitch

1.This I found came as a BIG surprise to even me. When I first watched Gossip Girl I thought that Chuck sickened me a little but Ed Westwick is a total babe!

Straight Crush

Totally a coincidence that this video was posted a few hours after I did my last post. I like what he has to say and agree with him 100% - Yes it does suck but its reality and reality does suck some times... I'm chalking it up to shit happens! Also as much as I am sure you would all like a juicy story about how I managed to seduce him and subsequently get his straight cock in my mouth... Its not going to happen. Sorry to disappoint :D

Went for the first run in like a week and a half tonight- I was actually good managed to run the whole way without blowing too hard. The fun thing was I got to take Aunty Coles dog Daxter with me. Doesnt sound so novel right? and you are probably wondering what the excitement is about it... Hes just so adorable to watch. Basically hes 80% blind and I run at night time so every time we run into a shadow he loses all sense of direction and cuts me off. For the most part hes just adorable because AC has taught him to carry his leash and crap bags. He took a big dump like 2 mins in so being the responsible neighbor I cleaned it up and got him to carry it (Im mean youre fucking deluded if you think Im going to run with a bag of shit for 3k's) and he just trots along the rest of the way with the bag attached to his leash looking so proud of himself. 

Fuck that reminds me- totally left it sitting outside the front door!

Gotta fly

love,

me xo

10 Things

Reasons I'm Crushing On YOU!

1. Your gorgeous smile
2. The amazing color of your eyes
3. The fact that you are always happy
4. You know how to laugh
5. More importantly- you know how to laugh at yourself
6. Your body (and how all of your clothes seem to fit to perfection)
7. That you told me I was the coolest person here
8. You don't judge others... unless its necessary
9. Your loud and somewhat obnoxious laugh
10. Because I know I can't have you

So there is this guy at work- You know how every now and then you see someone who is hot and you pray to god that they have a shit personality or some sort of STD because it seems a crime for any one person to be that heart stoppingly gorgeous- Yeah he is one of them... only to add insult to injury he has the most amazing personality I have ever encountered. Admittedly I am very shallow and superficial when it comes to who I like but this guy- I know to some degree of absolute certainty I would still have some kind of crush on him even if he was ugly. 

Its almost like being around him is an addiction.

Of course he is straight! He also has a girlfriend who might I add, is not all that attractive. I can't decide if the ugly girl loses him points for having poor taste or triples the ones he has because he is obviously in it for her personality which means he isn't shallow?

His last day at work is next Wednesday and I think I will find work just that little bit more unbearable once he is gone... 

DESPERATE

Dear prospective employer,

It has recently been brought to my attention that you may be having some reservations about employing me.

Sleep easy friend! This letter is here to expel any doubt from your tiny brain. In fact, by the end of this letter I would not be surprised if I have you questioning your own decision making capabilities. I implore you, dear friend, not to feel bad for not hiring me already- it is an easy mistake to make... however one that should only be made once! There are three key factors which I believe (quite emphatically) set me apart from every other Joe looking for a job.

Number Uno:

I am SO desperate for a job that I will work long hours and not complain. Make me your bitch- have me up all hours of the night running your errands, typing up your reports, ANYTHING. I am somewhat desperate and willing. 

Number Dos:

I am willing to take a pay cut. At this point I am happy if my wages only cover my rent and food expenses. Im not sure if you are quite grasping just how desperate I am... Let me put this into perspective for you; Most employees are looking for $45,000+ per annum- I spend $60 a week on groceries and $140 on rent... this means that in a whole year I am spending  $10,400 on necessities. I can undercut any applicant by a good $30,000 a year.

Number Three:

In lieu of a bonus structure/incentives scheme I would be more than happy to perform sexual favors. You are 82 and I am 22 - there is a good 60 year between us... lets face it I am the best you are going to get. Are you beginning to fully understand how desperate I am?  

Now that you are clear on just how serious I am about filling this vacancy I have taken the liberty of clearing my schedule for the remainder of this week for training and induction. 

I would like to take this opportunity to thank you for considering me for this position and I look forward to working with you.

Love always,

DR 

So I came home from a night out last night with a big hickey on my neck and I have no recollection of getting one... and also have not even an inkling of who may have given it to me... I hope he was hot!

Sick to my Stomach

Okay so I read this blog "Just Another Teen Wanker" and although I find the validity of some of the stories questionable I still like to read it. Its like watching a trashy American sitcom almost- "Like sangs through the hourglass so are the days of our lives".

The thing that has gotten me about this is the most recent Saga- basically Mark is seeing new beau Deen and Deen seems to be a nice guy- that is until Mark find out that the uncle that Deen has been spending time with is some old creep who pays him to clean his house naked and one condition is that he has to try and stay hard for as long as he can while he does it. 

Im a little disturbed by the story because I hate that there is that kind of depravity out there- Im not as disturbed because I doubt it is true. The thing that gets me is the responses to the initial post where Mark calls Deen a rent boy and voices his outrage at the situation. Basically every comment makes this a non issue and some even go as far as being on Deens side in the matter. Obviously these people think its real otherwise why bother commenting right? What kind of fucking message do they think they are sending to the gay community when they condone suck sick behavior? 

Now in his latest post he has decided that it is not such a bad thing and that he himself would consider doing it himself. Sure I get that this probably isn't a real situation- but what if it was and all of these perverted bloggers out there are rooting for this kid to whore himself out? 

In true DR style I have something to say about the situation, admittedly I was a little drunk, but reading my comment I think my stance is presented in a pretty clear cut manner:

Just going back and reading some of the comments on your last post and to be honest dude they kind of made me angry... Gays world wide are fighting to drop this stereotype of being promiscuous- Yes I understand that Deen is not having sex with this guy but it is perverted all the same. Presumably you are both quite young? And Presumably this guy is quite old? (if not old- old in comparison) Why the hell then are so many people condoning what is happening by just pretending that it is a non issue- This guy should be old enough to know that what he is doing is perverted and wrong and Deen should have enough self respect to know that he is being exploited. 

Gay or not- this is definitely an action of a sexual nature. I mean come on- he has to stay hard for as long as he can in this guys house- are you kidding me?! Just because he is not having sex with this guy doesn't mean it isn't on the cards in future. 

I am sickened that no one is trying to stop you from being with this guy or better trying to encourage you to get Deen to stop seeing his "uncle". Im sickened even more by the fact that you were A) told to calm down and B) told by someone that you were "blowing this out or proportion", that they were "kind of on Deens side", asked if you were "willing to give up on your buddy because he has a side job?", to try not to be "too judgmental about Deens 'arrangement'", told not to "take it too seriously", that you "have no reason not to trust Deen", . What kind of example are we setting for our younger community? 

I don't think this has been flown far enough out of proportion... Proportionally this issue has been shrunken by the ignorant and irresponsible. Deen needs to get a wake up call and maybe youre the one to give it to him? I also hate this this has been boiled down to something as common as a side job! I also cant figure out why you have no reason not to trust him... not only did he lie to you but look at what he was doing behind your back! Maybe these people want you just to be happy with Deen but to be honest- better to do something about this now than to let is fester and REALLY get hurt

Condoning this kind of behavior is setting back our community decades in the progress we have made to lose these stereotypes.

Would love to hear YOUR take on the situation!!

love, 

me

Cock Suckers R Us

Me: "Fuck Sam Evans has the sexiest lips in all the land"

Auntie Cole: "You get those kinda lips from suckin' cock!"

Me: "God I hope so"

Auntie Cole: "Thats how Angelina Jolie got hers... from sucking' the cock"

Me: "And that's why hers are all slack and saggy now..."

Auntie Cole: "Coz' she stopped suckin' cock"

SUUUPER excited! There is a very real posibility that I am about to start a bidding war between two prospective employees for my john hand-cock on their dotted line. Finally someone wants to hire me! Watch this space as I may be moving VEEEEERY soon.

Love
Me xo

Soon to be 22!

Well I have upped my game well and truly on this running biz! I am now planning out on my naked man calendar how many kilometers I need to run and have upped my running to 5 times a week with one day of speed training in there. I also went and got my sunning analysed at a local spots shop and it turns out I do all kinds of crazy shit with my feet when I run which explains the fucked ankles and bad shin splints.

I dont really know what else to say... work is still shit! But I may have a job interview soon for a similar role but on the same wage as my boss so keep your fingers and toes crossed for me!!

Oh its my birthday on Sunday!!! I dont think I have anything planned at the moment. Being on this health bender I dont want to go out drinking and ruin all my good work... I have managed to lose 5kg in 2 weeks so I've reached my half way mark in half the time I intended to reach it yay me.

LOVE

Me

P.S. I TOTALLY almost forgot- I got a reply from "she cunt" about her crappy staff. It was very minimal and polite. I thought that was either quite diplomatic of here or shes too fucking stupid to realize when someone is having a laugh at her expense and challenging her abilities. Anyway here you go my sweets:

Hi DawnRaver

Thank you for notifying me of this – I have passed onto our communications team to rectify.

 I very much appreciate your email.

 

Kind Regards,

She Cunt

No Really... Go Fuck Yourself

Okay so I have drafted the email to this hopeless she bitch and her useless team of "Marketers and Communicators" and it goes a little something like this:

Dear She-Cunt,

Forgive the lateness of this email. I had planned to bring up this point should I have been given the chance for an interview. However I feel that it is only sporting for a young Communications Graduate, whom has hands on experience in developing successful social media campaigns, to point out to you that the current Facebook page that your shitty attempt at a Museum employs is currently in violation of this platforms' 'Statement of Rights and Responsibilities'. 

To save you the hassle of trying to figure out where exactly this page has gone wrong I have taken an excerpt from Facebook's Help Center/FAQ's  page:

"The account I created to promote my business, band or other organization is now disabled.

Per our Statement of Rights and Responsibilities, Facebook profiles must represent an individual. Users aren't permitted to maintain an account under the name of their organization, or use personal accounts to advertise or promote themselves professionally. If your profile was listed under a non-individual name, or was used primarily for professional promotion, this is probably why it was removed."

(Please refer to: http://www.facebook.com/help/?search=can%20personal%20profiles%20be%20used%20to%20promote%20a%20business?)

In simple terms, this means that in signing up with Facebook all users agree that "Profile" pages are to represent individuals only and Facebook actually reserves the right to close any page without notice should there be any violation. Facebook also states in their 'Statement of Rights and Responsibilities' that accounts closed at their discretion may not be reopened without express permission.

I hope this information helps to clarify this problem for your Communications team. Now the challenge has been identified I am sure your team will be more than capable of rectifying this simple Social Media faux pas. If you have any further queries regarding this matter, please do not hesitate to get in contact with with me.

Regards

DawnRaver

Not as rude as the one I sent my boss- But I like to think its a little antagonistic and condescending- This may not bother her as much as i want it to but hey it makes me feel better...

Love

Me

Go Fuck Yourself!

Sorry guys! I have been meaning to post again but I am away for a long weekend and haven't really had a chance too because I have been catching up with my family which has been nice- I have made the decision to make more of an effort this year at keeping in touch with old acquaintances, friends and family.

So you are probably wondering about the title of this post... Well it starts off like this:

Before X-Mas last year I found this AMAZING sounding job that I thought I was perfect for. I spent three weeks working closely with my old boss (who has not only had a hand in recruitment but also has a husband who works for a recruitment agency) constructing the perfect CV coupled with the perfect cover letter. Never before had I put so much effort into one document; not even if it meant passing or failing a paper at Uni. so I think you can kind see how serious I was about this job.

Finally half way through my first week back and I get the go ahead from JB to send in my masterpiece. I get it in two days before the applications officially close so I have a minimum four day wait (weekend in between) to see if I even get a foot in the door. 1 week and 1 day later and I get a letter in the mail- something along the lines of:

"Dear DawnRave,

Thank you for your application for the position of Marketing and Communications Position. Unfortunately we will not be requiring you to come in for an interview. We chose to send you this via letter as we are not up with technology enough to send you an email and we are too chicken shit to phone you and tell you ourselves. 

Enclosed you will find some pamphlets on our organisation for your perusal so that you can see all that you are missing out on because we honestly dont think you are good enough to work for us (hence the reason you did not get an interview).

Best wishes for all of your future endeavors,

The cunts form the place youre to crap to work for"

Basically the "Go Fuck Yourself" was aimed at this shitty place... not because they didnt hire me, or even interview me of that matter. The "Go Fuck Yourself" is because they had the audacity to stuff the envelope full of propaganda for their place- leaflets about whats on and what they do etc etc. To me I find that the height of corporate rudeness. Its like saying "We dont want you but come and visit us anyway" or better still "Youre not wanted here but youre so pathetic that you will still probably want to come and visit in the hopes of running into someone from recruitment and try begging them for a chance"

Basically I hate this place now for that simple fact... I know that is probably now how they intended this to be perceived but like it or not that how it was. So my next move from here is to hold my head high and keep applying for as many jobs as I can find. This may even mean moving, which I think is kinda sad because I really love where Im living and this shitty city is kind of growing on me now... but what I also plan to do is anonymously fuck said companies whole social media campaign since its not done properly and is in violation of the terms of the platform they are using. If the platform doesn't close it down as they should when i notify them then I will send said company an email pointing out their fuck up and the fact that the person they are paying to do this job (i.e. the she bitch that wouldnt give me an interview) is basically being paid for nothing and needs to be fired or demoted and also point out that by not hiring me they made possibly the biggest mistake of their lives... and they when they beg me to come and work for them I will simply send them a letter similar to the one they sent me and stuff it with a flyer that maps out my plans for the next few months and see how they like it....

Rant over and I needa go- MamaRave needs needs to use the computer.

Love

Me

xo

HOW DARE YOU!

So I have decided that my boss/the CEO of the company i work for is the most hateful woman alive! She loves to embarrass people in front others just to make herself feel good. Shes quite happy to lie through her teeth or deny she has said something in the past to protect what ever ridiculous thing she has come up with at present. She will tell us to do things at work or tell us that she wants us to do something differently from now on and then months down the track (sometimes even days) she will tell us we are doing things "completely wrong" and talk to us a like a bunch of dim witted arse holes and then completely contradict what she had told us to do by coming up with something new. But to her it isn't new , to her it is the way we should have always been doing things and she will deny deny deny that she has EVER told us otherwise.

I felt the full force of her nastiness on Monday.

Every week each manager is supposed to hold a 15 minute meeting with their team to go over performance figures from the previous week and set new goals. For most team leaders this ends up just being a catch up from the weekend- but for me I choose to do them fortnightly and for half an hour so that we can actually accomplish something. So we discuss our goals and expectations and then normally we play a team building game and I always link the game in with an aspect of their work so this week it was the need to think 'laterally' sometimes in order to progress. For every single team building session I have done with this team we have used the companies training room which happens to be connected to the CEO's office. Every time we have done these games the noise has been a little loud but it has been laughter and only for a max of 10 minutes (most of the time only about 5). I dont tell them to quieten down because the game is their time and I want them to be able to feel like it is okay to have some fun at work. Every single time i have done this I have been met with no qualms about the noise from the CEO.

Apparently Monday was a different story. My senior manager came out of the CEO's office and asked me to keep it down as they were in  a meeting- which was fair enough andI could see her point. i was just in the middle of doing something that needed my full attention for all of 30seconds then i was going to tell them to quieten down... I got as far as "Okay guys!" and the CEO comes storming out of her office and says to me in front of my whole team:

"Um these are our offices and we actually work during the day" in the most condescending tone ever!  Actually work! As if I don't do a lions share of the bull crap work that Im not even paid to do. As if I dont take work home with me that isnt even mine to do. As if I dont work 50 hours most of the time and only get paid for 40.

What a whore faced bitch.

So i turned to my team and said to them "My mistake guys- I thought this was the training room. My Fault we'll go into the break room." Just to get some sort of reaction but I dont think she heard me so I took my team into the break lounge and we finished off our team building session and it went well considering our interruptions. As soon as we had finished and I was back at my desk and everyone was busy working and senior manager came over to me and told me that I was no longer to use the training room for my think tank meetings and that I need to learn to control my team quicker.

Not only was i pissed that I had been kicked out of the one room that's sole purpose is for those kinds of meeting but the bitch then tried to say that i cant control my team. I guess that is why they managed to go through 4 managers in the space of 1 year before they got me. I guess thats why I have managed to increase their profit margins by a good 75-100% consistently for 2 years.

So I sent her this email:

"I appreciate that you work in your office during the day and I appologise profusely for 
the noise today. However, I do not appreciate being spoken to in such a condescending 
manner in front of my team. I was about to ask them to quieten down when you came out and I am unimpressed that I was not even given a chance by you to ask them to be quiet. I am not the only person who has an issue with the way you spoke to me as several of my staff made comments as we exited the room.

Forgive me for thinking that that training room should actually be used for training and the chill out room be used for entitled breaks. I have held many training sessions in this room with similar noise levels and have not been asked to quieten down. So this discontent comes as a shock to me. At the end of the day these staff ARE the company and I am doing my utmost to keep them interested and educated and I appologise if this gets in the way of other peoples work for a small time out of their day."

Okay so it was kind of rude but she needed to get the message that just because she is the CEO she doesnt get to treat people like that. And if I let her get away with it she will forever try to walk all over me like she does to our HR lady, our Receptionist and our Senior Manager. No way in hell am I having that- I dont give a fuck who you are- common decency is not a hard thing!!!

So anyway she reads it and 30 minutes later Im in her office getting literally screamed at- She was so furious with my email she was shaking and she sounded like she was about to cry. The trick with her is that when she does this most people cry or have a break down- and by most I mean that the 5 or 6 times i have seen her do it that has been what has happened. I wasn't going to let this get me down at all so I concentrated on my breathing, completely tuned her out and just stared her down. Forget giving me a chance to have my say once she was done screaming she dismissed me. 

All I can remember her saying was "HOW DARE YOU!" when I walked in like she was my fucking mother or something. So basically she doesnt exist to me any more- she wants/expects me to do all these favors for her i.e. starting up a social media campaign and designing a new web site because I know how to do it and it cheaper to get me to than to hire someone to do it. But she expects me to do it in my own time without pay- before I was quite happy for the experience for my CV but now I have told my manager that Im not doing anything more than my job as a Team Manager . Because Im the only one in the company that has any kind of knowledge on that stuff she is basically fucked and will need to pay someone like $200 an hour where as she could have had it for free. 

MFM threesome... Sure why not!

Okay so I have been a bit shit lately so I guess I have a bit to catch you guys up on.

Number one- The health buz is going pretty swell I have been checking out Davey Wavey Fitness Blog and have found some good tips on speeding up my metabolism- woo hoo! I have run home from work 4 nights this week and still not had a cigarette- I have been drinking 4 bottles of water every day and eating salads and lots of other fun healthy things. I think the thing that is making this so fun is that everyone in my house is getting in on it- Paz is well fit and kind of puts me and Joey to shame but its good because when i run with Paz I run a lot harder than when i run with Joey- I think I have this thing where i dont want to look weak in front of Paz so I push myself a lot harder which is good coz normally Im good at talking myself out of shit like that.

Number two- I have been meaning to tell you this for a long time- like since i left for my Xmas break...

Theres this guy Iv been fucking on and off for the last couple of years- BIG penis - possibly the biggest one Iv ever seen- hes also convinced hes still straight but just likes cock every now and then- even after two years of gay sex with me. He is also possibly the BEST kisser I have ever had which I think makes him a lot more appealing since I pride myself on my kissing abilities. Anyway- we were SMSing on the drive up to Xmas and for a while now he has been saying he wants a 3some with me and another guy and then out of the blue I get this message at 3am in the morning:

"Are you awake? I have some great news"

Obviously nothing wakes me when Im asleep and I dont check it until Im in the car and on my way to the family the next day so I ask what is up and he tells me hes found another girl to have a threesome with us- Apparently she thinks two guys fucking is hot. We talk about it alot and being pretty liberal on things of this nature Im keen to give it a try- hell if the vag thing doesnt work out at least thers going to be another cock to suck. So i get back from the holiday and I get this random message:

"hey its jes- the chick that wants the threesome. How are you?"

So we start txting and shit and she suggests we hook up without him once or twice and im like;

"Hes told you Im gay right?" and I get-

"I have an ass too you know"

I was like jesus way to cut straight to the chase! Anyway This whole conversation got me thinking- what if Im bisexual? How often does that really happen that someone comes out as gay and then finds out they are either bi or straight even?

Imagine the mind fuck your parents would have to go through!! Mine would go spare- Mum told me she was relieved when I came out so I think she would think I was mad if I told her I likes pussy again. Funny thing though is that when me and Mum were driving together- keep in mind we talk about most things- she asks me if I have ever had second thoughts about being gay. It was as if she had read my freaking mind!!! I never once told her about this girl or this threesome (I mean come on- some things you just dont say!) But it was crazy! Anyway - Gay male... quite possibly about to have some vaginal intercourse- luckily I have done it before otherwise I think I would probably have a break down when the time came! I was talking to Woody about it the other night on facebook and he wished me luck which I thought was sweet and hilarious. I forget sometimes that some gays haven't had straight sex at all in their life.

When this happens you can expect a full update on the happenings because I am sure it will be eventful as hell!

Oh in other news my friend thats in the Army over here has decided he wants to try cock- I have been teasing him about it for years now as a joke and it finally came out the toher week and he wants me to be the one to "pop his cherry" since Im the only gay he knows lol. Fathom this for me though- straight army guys quite masculine- one would expect him just to want to fuck the hell out of a guy and maybe get his dick sucked and thats it... Not Denny- he wants to be fucked. I was so surprised my this- turns out you cant judge a book by its cover!!!

Anyway I am sure there is more but I am so tired right now I can barely think straight (mind the pun).

Hope you are all well :D

xoxox