HOW DARE YOU!

So I have decided that my boss/the CEO of the company i work for is the most hateful woman alive! She loves to embarrass people in front others just to make herself feel good. Shes quite happy to lie through her teeth or deny she has said something in the past to protect what ever ridiculous thing she has come up with at present. She will tell us to do things at work or tell us that she wants us to do something differently from now on and then months down the track (sometimes even days) she will tell us we are doing things "completely wrong" and talk to us a like a bunch of dim witted arse holes and then completely contradict what she had told us to do by coming up with something new. But to her it isn't new , to her it is the way we should have always been doing things and she will deny deny deny that she has EVER told us otherwise.

I felt the full force of her nastiness on Monday.

Every week each manager is supposed to hold a 15 minute meeting with their team to go over performance figures from the previous week and set new goals. For most team leaders this ends up just being a catch up from the weekend- but for me I choose to do them fortnightly and for half an hour so that we can actually accomplish something. So we discuss our goals and expectations and then normally we play a team building game and I always link the game in with an aspect of their work so this week it was the need to think 'laterally' sometimes in order to progress. For every single team building session I have done with this team we have used the companies training room which happens to be connected to the CEO's office. Every time we have done these games the noise has been a little loud but it has been laughter and only for a max of 10 minutes (most of the time only about 5). I dont tell them to quieten down because the game is their time and I want them to be able to feel like it is okay to have some fun at work. Every single time i have done this I have been met with no qualms about the noise from the CEO.

Apparently Monday was a different story. My senior manager came out of the CEO's office and asked me to keep it down as they were in  a meeting- which was fair enough andI could see her point. i was just in the middle of doing something that needed my full attention for all of 30seconds then i was going to tell them to quieten down... I got as far as "Okay guys!" and the CEO comes storming out of her office and says to me in front of my whole team:

"Um these are our offices and we actually work during the day" in the most condescending tone ever!  Actually work! As if I don't do a lions share of the bull crap work that Im not even paid to do. As if I dont take work home with me that isnt even mine to do. As if I dont work 50 hours most of the time and only get paid for 40.

What a whore faced bitch.

So i turned to my team and said to them "My mistake guys- I thought this was the training room. My Fault we'll go into the break room." Just to get some sort of reaction but I dont think she heard me so I took my team into the break lounge and we finished off our team building session and it went well considering our interruptions. As soon as we had finished and I was back at my desk and everyone was busy working and senior manager came over to me and told me that I was no longer to use the training room for my think tank meetings and that I need to learn to control my team quicker.

Not only was i pissed that I had been kicked out of the one room that's sole purpose is for those kinds of meeting but the bitch then tried to say that i cant control my team. I guess that is why they managed to go through 4 managers in the space of 1 year before they got me. I guess thats why I have managed to increase their profit margins by a good 75-100% consistently for 2 years.

So I sent her this email:

"I appreciate that you work in your office during the day and I appologise profusely for 
the noise today. However, I do not appreciate being spoken to in such a condescending 
manner in front of my team. I was about to ask them to quieten down when you came out and I am unimpressed that I was not even given a chance by you to ask them to be quiet. I am not the only person who has an issue with the way you spoke to me as several of my staff made comments as we exited the room.

Forgive me for thinking that that training room should actually be used for training and the chill out room be used for entitled breaks. I have held many training sessions in this room with similar noise levels and have not been asked to quieten down. So this discontent comes as a shock to me. At the end of the day these staff ARE the company and I am doing my utmost to keep them interested and educated and I appologise if this gets in the way of other peoples work for a small time out of their day."

Okay so it was kind of rude but she needed to get the message that just because she is the CEO she doesnt get to treat people like that. And if I let her get away with it she will forever try to walk all over me like she does to our HR lady, our Receptionist and our Senior Manager. No way in hell am I having that- I dont give a fuck who you are- common decency is not a hard thing!!!

So anyway she reads it and 30 minutes later Im in her office getting literally screamed at- She was so furious with my email she was shaking and she sounded like she was about to cry. The trick with her is that when she does this most people cry or have a break down- and by most I mean that the 5 or 6 times i have seen her do it that has been what has happened. I wasn't going to let this get me down at all so I concentrated on my breathing, completely tuned her out and just stared her down. Forget giving me a chance to have my say once she was done screaming she dismissed me. 

All I can remember her saying was "HOW DARE YOU!" when I walked in like she was my fucking mother or something. So basically she doesnt exist to me any more- she wants/expects me to do all these favors for her i.e. starting up a social media campaign and designing a new web site because I know how to do it and it cheaper to get me to than to hire someone to do it. But she expects me to do it in my own time without pay- before I was quite happy for the experience for my CV but now I have told my manager that Im not doing anything more than my job as a Team Manager . Because Im the only one in the company that has any kind of knowledge on that stuff she is basically fucked and will need to pay someone like $200 an hour where as she could have had it for free. 

MFM threesome... Sure why not!

Okay so I have been a bit shit lately so I guess I have a bit to catch you guys up on.

Number one- The health buz is going pretty swell I have been checking out Davey Wavey Fitness Blog and have found some good tips on speeding up my metabolism- woo hoo! I have run home from work 4 nights this week and still not had a cigarette- I have been drinking 4 bottles of water every day and eating salads and lots of other fun healthy things. I think the thing that is making this so fun is that everyone in my house is getting in on it- Paz is well fit and kind of puts me and Joey to shame but its good because when i run with Paz I run a lot harder than when i run with Joey- I think I have this thing where i dont want to look weak in front of Paz so I push myself a lot harder which is good coz normally Im good at talking myself out of shit like that.

Number two- I have been meaning to tell you this for a long time- like since i left for my Xmas break...

Theres this guy Iv been fucking on and off for the last couple of years- BIG penis - possibly the biggest one Iv ever seen- hes also convinced hes still straight but just likes cock every now and then- even after two years of gay sex with me. He is also possibly the BEST kisser I have ever had which I think makes him a lot more appealing since I pride myself on my kissing abilities. Anyway- we were SMSing on the drive up to Xmas and for a while now he has been saying he wants a 3some with me and another guy and then out of the blue I get this message at 3am in the morning:

"Are you awake? I have some great news"

Obviously nothing wakes me when Im asleep and I dont check it until Im in the car and on my way to the family the next day so I ask what is up and he tells me hes found another girl to have a threesome with us- Apparently she thinks two guys fucking is hot. We talk about it alot and being pretty liberal on things of this nature Im keen to give it a try- hell if the vag thing doesnt work out at least thers going to be another cock to suck. So i get back from the holiday and I get this random message:

"hey its jes- the chick that wants the threesome. How are you?"

So we start txting and shit and she suggests we hook up without him once or twice and im like;

"Hes told you Im gay right?" and I get-

"I have an ass too you know"

I was like jesus way to cut straight to the chase! Anyway This whole conversation got me thinking- what if Im bisexual? How often does that really happen that someone comes out as gay and then finds out they are either bi or straight even?

Imagine the mind fuck your parents would have to go through!! Mine would go spare- Mum told me she was relieved when I came out so I think she would think I was mad if I told her I likes pussy again. Funny thing though is that when me and Mum were driving together- keep in mind we talk about most things- she asks me if I have ever had second thoughts about being gay. It was as if she had read my freaking mind!!! I never once told her about this girl or this threesome (I mean come on- some things you just dont say!) But it was crazy! Anyway - Gay male... quite possibly about to have some vaginal intercourse- luckily I have done it before otherwise I think I would probably have a break down when the time came! I was talking to Woody about it the other night on facebook and he wished me luck which I thought was sweet and hilarious. I forget sometimes that some gays haven't had straight sex at all in their life.

When this happens you can expect a full update on the happenings because I am sure it will be eventful as hell!

Oh in other news my friend thats in the Army over here has decided he wants to try cock- I have been teasing him about it for years now as a joke and it finally came out the toher week and he wants me to be the one to "pop his cherry" since Im the only gay he knows lol. Fathom this for me though- straight army guys quite masculine- one would expect him just to want to fuck the hell out of a guy and maybe get his dick sucked and thats it... Not Denny- he wants to be fucked. I was so surprised my this- turns out you cant judge a book by its cover!!!

Anyway I am sure there is more but I am so tired right now I can barely think straight (mind the pun).

Hope you are all well :D

xoxox

Back to work :(

Okay so keeping true to my promise I had to force myself to post tonight. First day back at work today and it actually wasn't as bad as 8 I thought it was going to be- it went really quickly and my staff did good so I was happy. Also finally got my CV and cover letter all finished so I will drop it to the place where I want to work some time this week. I'm actually really stoked with how it turned out and there is no way i'm he'll I could have done it without all the help I got from JB!!!! I have been good on the health train so far- kind of easing myself into it- I actually HAD breakfast this morning which was new. Normally around 3 at work I would be dying for a smoke and I managed to sit out with the smokers and not have one at all which I was pleased about!! Iv been hitting the water and green tea pretty hard which is good!! Then me and Joey ran home from work which was only about 3kms but it's a good start I surprised myself by the fact that we actually ran nearly the whole thing!!!

Mum is down visiting for a couple of day which is real nice! I got home today and she had bought me a whole lot of groceries, vaccuumed my bedroom, scrubbed my bathroom AND cooked a roast for us all! Got I love my mum :D

that about it from me- I see my views have kinda dropped a bit- I'm worrying I'm getting boring :s if there is anything particular you want to hear or know about me or want to know m opinion on email me and let me know :D

Love
from
Me
xo

My New Life: Day 2

Hey guys :D

So I didnt do too much today. Went in and hung out with Shaneinei which was fun times. I love having friends that you dont see forever and you finally hang out and its like no time has passed.

The poor girl I think she was probably a bit shell shocked at the amount of walking I made her to today. We went all over town to find Kay an engagement present thats on Saturday (SUPER EXCITED). The amount of shops that we went into that had me convinced that the only decent shit there is to buy in this town is photo frames was unimaginable... they have some of the junkiest shops here! I was starting to lose all hope when I finally managed to find a set of knives in the sweet stand. I liked them anyway and would have gotten them but the biggest seller was that they were 60% fucking amazing.

Had some sushi for lunch which was kind of average and twice the price that I would pay back home which was kind of disappointing.

Got home and decided to go for a run.... thanks to mum who kinda gave me the push I needed since I was feeling particularly unmotivated.

This three weeks off has killed me physically.... I only lasted 1k before I had to stop for a walk where as before (before I cut my foot) I could have done 4. I have a lot of work a head of me but I know I can do it!!!

My New Life: Day 1

 
Today, Wednesday 5th January 2011 marks the official turning of the newest page of my life.
 
Okay so today wasnt THAT momentus- didnt quite hit the steamed veggies and water today... I figure for now I have the party on saturday so I dont really need to cut out ALL unhealthy shit- Im still drinking and eating pretty shit (although now Im up home with ma and pa I am eating a lot more fresh produce). But something kind of big happened internally today.
 
I was parusing facebook today and stumbled upon photos of my ex and his new boyfriend on their New Years holiday, It has been over a year since we split so I was quite surprised at how upset it had made me. For some reason it gave me a knot in my stomach- a sick feeling kind of washed over me and has lingered for the whole day. The feeling did dull gradually and I decided that I would not look at this as something for me to wallow about I have chosen to use this as a motivating factor.
 
This year is my year. Last year was all about me- or so I thought but it was the wrong kind of selfishness. It was material things that I used to make myself feel good. I now have a full wardobe and nice living room but today made me realise that I have not made as much progress as I thought I had. Instead of actually dealing with all of my emotional baggage I was just swapping it for my want of things. This year I am going to make it about ME but in a mind body and sould kind of approach...
 
These are the 10 promises I have made to myself:

• I need to face my problems head on
• Things will get worse before they can get better
• I cant expect to be happy straight away
• I will save more
• I will buy less
• I will excersize more
• I will eat less
• I will drink less
• I wont smoke
• I will feel better one day

 
So today I have been shovelling bark for Mum today- 2 trailer loads, this was closeley followed up by some firewood stacking and chopping (its summer here but it cant hurt to be prepared right?). I kind of went a bit crazy with determination. This was mainley sparked by the photos I had seen and how sick, jealous, hurt and angry they had made me feel. I was going to follow all of this up with a run but my cousin and his wife and two kids decided to come over for dinner which was actually really nice- their daughters are really cool (theyre only like 12 and 7). I was like the COOLEST person in the world to them... well for tonight at least. We did cartwheels out on the lawn and then drew pictures using both our hands and then we put the pen between our toeas and wrote stuff with our feet- now I have two cool pictures to hang up at work when I go back. Then at the end of the night they ran up and gave me the biggest hug goodbye. It made me miss being young and carefree and innocent!!
 
But tomorrow I will be going for a mass run for sure- I have my new trainers and my iPod- I am unstoppable!
 
I hope you are all keeping sexy!
 
Love from me

New Beginnings

So I have committed myself to believing that 2011 is the year of change for me! 

I have spent the last week writing a "new and improved" CV - (How can something be Improved if its New right?). I am now laboriously poring over a cover letter for a job I am going to apply for - and I'm going to get!

(I call on the power of the secret!)

I have decided that I really need to get my shit sorted for saving for this trip with Paz. I have worked it out that I will need to tuck away about $200 a week which means that after rent and food I am going to have NO money for myself.... Lifes hard but it will be worth it!

The last and probably biggest change for 2011 is the health kick that Paz and I have decided to go on. So I'm 6ft and 110kg and Im looking to slim down and tone up. The first mile stone to my new sexy life is the half marathon in March. 

Paz and I are cutting out Booze, Coffee, Cigarettes and Takeaways for two months to help us get to the peak of physical condition for this mad long run! Im hoping this will stem over to our lives after the detox. My goal behind this is to makes this a life thing rather than a 2 month goal. Im doing it big. Iv gotten so serous about it a Google imaged "6ft 110kg male" and this is what I came up with:

Im by no means in to wrestling but I want to look like John Cena one day. First thing tomorrow Im going for a run then Im going to shoot into town and buy a planner so that I can mark out my weeks- For any of this to be a success I need to have it in writing somewhere... This is where this blog come in!

I will use this as an outlet. As a progress report. As a support network. I am going to blog 5 times a week- even if its just to check in an tell you all how exhausted I am or how much I am hating eating healthy. I decided the other night that I need to keep a structure- the planner helps me to do that and getting into the habit of blogging about my experiences will make it something that I am forced to think about every day!

If ANYONE out there in blog land has managed to successfully go on a health kick that has remained permanent it would be great to hear from you. Similarly- and possibly more importantly- if there is ANYONE out there in blog land who has decided to make it a New Years resolution to maybe slim down and tone up or just make healthier decisions I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to hear from you... I may be pushing it a bit but if there are any fitness guru's or nutritionists in the house that would like to lend a helping hand I would basically love you forever and promise you my first born child (failing that a vial of my sperm).

Anywho- this post was more for me than you. Putting all of my plans out there on my blog adds some sort of finality to it but as always I would still love to hear from you- comments, emails, more followers... what ever!

Peace out my little sex kittens!

PS I just realised that I have asked people to get in touch with me in more than one post but i havent even given you any email address to do it- you can find it in my profile now but its thedawnrave@hotmail.com for those who cant be bothered going to look (I know I would be one of those people)

HAPPY BELATED NEW YEAR

Hey beautiful people!!!

So I have finally managed to sneak on to mums computer... Yes I am back home visiting the folks for a bit- and I wanted to wish you Happy X-Mas and New Years!

I thought I would catch you all up on what I have been up to so Xmas we had up the east coast with my dads family. Thank god I had brought Paz with me- shes the kind of person that makes everything fun. Easiest thing for me to do... and Im guessing the least boring for you would be to bullet the highlights since there wasnt much TOO exciting going on:

• 6 hour trip Xmas eve up the coast
• 3 hours into the drive we decide we are going to do a half marathon in March
• 4 hours into the drive we decide that we need to prepare for this by doing a 2 month detox
• We arrive and I have to do introductions for Paz and all the family I havent seen in at least 5 years
• I introduce Paz to my Cousin and his wife
• Turns out his wife is actually a cousin
• I proceed to get extremely drunk to live down the embarrassment
• Paz and I decide I have 2 hot cousins
• I would do them both if we werent related (Is that wrong?)
• We decide that one of the hot cousins is a snob
• We decide that his fiancee is equally a bitch
• Xmas lunch and I have to sit by the cousin who I thought was a wife of a cousin
• Boxing day and we decided to get away by booking a fully day of tennis, kayaking, snorkelling, and bush walking
• 30 mins into tennis we decide we are shit and give up
• We do our 45 min bush walk in over an hour
• We decide we are too fucked to do either snorkelling and kayaking
• Day after and we cant take it any more so decide to pack up and go camping around the coast

Okay so we decide to camp on the lawn on this backpackers for 15 bux a night which sounds really shitty but actually ended up being quite fun! Our neighbors were 5 Irish girls halfway through a world tour... needless to say we drank alot both nights we were there. The second night we got a bit sick of the backpackers because we had some oyung neightbors move into the dorm next to ours so we decided to go out for a drink- lucky we did because we found out the next morning through eavesdropping that the girl (whom we dubbed Sue) who had gate crashed a boys weekend ended up throwing up in the fridge in their dorm.

That day we decided we had had enough and moved a bit further up the coast. By this time I had been thinking just how fucking horny I was since I havent had a root in a couple of months now!! Thank god for the privacy of cubicle showers!

We head down the centre for New Years and I manage to get a friend to sneak in last night for a QF which is making me feel a lot less tense... was going to go for a run tonight now since I can actually focus on something other than my penis... turns out I left my fucking shoes in the car that Paz took home! not just my running shows but ALL my shoes which means Im barefoot for the next week until Im back home!!!

Anyway Im not sure if this post actually makes any sense or is actually that interesting but I think I just felt the need to just write!

Oh PS was meaning to tell you this so I sucked this guy AAAGES age like maybe 2 years ago and we have kept in touch via SMS but I cant really remeber him or what he looks like (or his name :S) anyway I got the dutch courage on NYE to ask him for his name and  I finally got a partial name like how some people like Bartholemue would call himself Bart kinda shit... so naturally I facebook stalked the contracted name plus last name and turns out this guy I have been dirty SMSing the last 2 years was sitting next to me in graduation this year and I was normal as since I had no idea who he was and im pretty sure he knew who I was! HAHA trust me!

Anyway thats it from me xoxoxox